This website is not about being a perfect wife who is always happy. How I see marriage now is very different from when I was single. I realized that being married is like unpurified water going through a filter apparatus. My weaknesses come into light in every unpleasant situation, argument, and tragedy. I have always seen myself as a good and kind person, but every single day I see that I’m far from that. I can see my heart and its condition and I never expected that marriage will make me want to assess myself with all honesty and search within why I behave like I behave.

In my marriage, there are situations where I don’t want to be, sometimes, these situations are brought by my husband’s circumstances. And these things make me unhappy. And in these moments, I ask myself why it makes me unhappy, what feelings do I have that I didn’t want to admit, and what virtues or character that I lack which can lead me to a resolution. I am little by little learning the real essence of love. It requires a continuous practice of unselfishness. I always have this tendency to focus on what I feel and how I was wronged, that sometimes I say words I really don’t mean just to make my point and get what I want. It’s terrible and the reality is, it’s me, it’s who I am.

I am thankful that my marriage lets me see my true self and makes me a better person little by little. I don’t have to stay the way I am and I don’t have to always reason that “it’s who I am.” I can change and be a better wife because that is the essence of love. And I realized that what makes a wife happy is learning to accept things she cannot change, making ways to reach what she can but being contented of what she has at the moment, appreciating her husband and other good things they have in life.

I must say a husband has a big role for a wife to be happy. Marriage is a mutual effort of love and understanding, and this is not an easy task. But we can always make it work if we desire it. For the wives out there, are you a wife with a happy heart? For husbands, are your wives happy? Husbands and wives, what are you willing to change in yourself to be happy or have a happy spouse? This is what this website is all about.

I want to thank the couples who are in a long distance relationship and in an interracial marriage like me and my husband for giving me the inspiration to put up this site. We are facing numerous challenges and differences to keep our family intact and healthy. My weaknesses cause me to fail and fall short from time to time but I am committed to better myself and serve my husband so he could be the best of himself and lead our family to a meaningful life.

The things that I write here are my experiences and my journey as a wife and I hope by sharing it I could help you in a small way as you walk your own journey. Feel free to give your thoughts so we can learn from each other’s perspective.

Jimi Knowles